Why it’s Okay to lose a best friend.

cropped-cropped-cropped-11.png

I’ve been reading a few of the dear best friends posts on social media and blogs and reading then made me realise a lot. Just because someone claimed to be there for you through thick and thin – the likelihood of it is – they’re not. People grow apart, and thats okay. You don’t need to try and hold on to your best friend  like i did.

Dear Best friend,

You can blame me, you can come up with a million reasons as to why you don’t trust me, but really, i don’t trust you.

You’ve bitched about me, lied about me and never once heard my side of the story. Never had I been disloyal to you and never will I be.

Whatever you think it was – it wasn’t. They chose you over me. I never said anything because if you were happy, thats all that mattered, it was that simple.

You stood and told me to my face to stay away from someone because you didn’t trust them – because if you don’t like someone, I don’t either. Thats how we were. Yet that hashtag of #Bestfriend got moved from me to her.  I would NEVER have treated you that way and I will never replace you.

Before, there would never have been a “are you coming out for my birthday” we’d be online shopping weeks before, planning and being at each others birthdays wouldn’t have been a second thought – you’re family.  Watching TV, eating way to much dinner on a Sunday, napping wherever we fell, the garden, sofa, bed…car! Eating ice cream and sitting in PJ’s all day Sunday was our thing.

Granted – I changed jobs and wasn’t around as much as i was working 80 hour weeks in our busiest period. Just so you know – I never gave up on you, i even invited you to come too.

We’d make plans, and i’d be waiting for you to ask about them, and there was nothing. Repeatedly. I was as bad with this.

I thought after last summer things would get back to being better again – I guess i was wrong.

Hearing what your best friend has said about you is heartbreaking, but i’m not shocked. I sided with you, always and forever, even when you were in the wrong about things. I would have your back because that’s loyalty – thats what best friends do.

Maybe this was me giving up.

Friendship and relationships are the same – it can never be a one-way street.

“It isn’t petty, it isn’t nasty. True friendship is supportive, accepting, understanding and is never less important than a boy. Best friends never, ever intentionally hurt their best friends , no matter what the reason may be. Once you do that, you just aren’t best friends anymore.”

How long you’ve known someone doesn’t judge how good of a friend they are to you. Actions speak louder than words, and never would i ever say i was completely innocent – I could have made more of an effort too – the difference with us is i’d never bad mouth you and thats what you spent last summer and how ever long before that doing.

When you love someone, you fight. There will always be bumps in the road, but I stuck around for longer than I should have. You know this. I know you know this. I forgive you for things that I never in a million years could imagine myself doing to you. You were my best friend. That meant unconditional love. Until it didn’t to you.

I kept choosing you when I should have been choosing me. Well, now, I choose me.

It breaks my heart over and over that it got to this stage – and although it’s me that officially decided we aren’t friends anymore – you decided this too.

Despite how this has all ended, I still love you and still thank you – That won’t ever change.

Thank you for our years of friendship and memories that can NEVER be topped by anybody. Thank you for showing me what true friendship is. Thank you for teaching me how to get up when i’ve fallen down, how to deal with a broken heart from a silly boy, how to be selfless, how to be forgiving and how to be a loyal friend.

People grow apart and I guess our apart was just too far to fix.

Love,
The best friend you pushed away.

Bees xo

 

Sunday Funday – Rain Edition.

It’s Sunday, It’s raining..again.

The sun is shining, everywhere is dry… OH wait, we live in England.

Instead of being super bored for the entire day, moaning that it’s a waste of a day and nature hates us and we only ever get 4 sunny days in England, take a look below at some easy date day idea’s to do in the rain! 

IMG_7648

Staying dry..

  1. Go bowling –  It’s like £6.19 at Hollywood bowl and student discount is available too! You can shove on jeans and a hoodie and this is still perfectly acceptable with those lovely red blue and white shoes..
  2. Go on a rainy day shopping spree – Whats the reason you’re stuck inside? Head into town and buy each other those cute rain coats (that are possibly only acceptable to wear at festivals) but you forget all about them when it isn’t raining. Orr just head straight to H&M and get another outfit that you probably don’t need.. Crop tops for £3.99, everyone needs those!
  3. Go out –  find a Cafe with a big window. Sit by the window and sip hot chocolate whilst making plans for another day.. or laugh at everyone getting soaked outside. (You can laugh cause it’s gonna be you in a while!).
  4. Eat – Go and eat too much food. When it rains we head straight to a Carvery. We eat our body weight then struggle to walk out, then we head straight home to put PJ’s on and chill with our food comas.
  5. House projects – Whether you wanna change one room or the entire house, nip out, grab magazines and catalogs and sit there and start getting ideas. ( I did this but actually just ended up making a photo collage and putting 7 strings of fairy lights up..)
  6. Go Ghost Hunting – Every town or city has some old places to check out, so try it.
  7. Arcade – An arcade doesn’t have to be expensive (unless you’re me and you REALLY need that £2 teddy from the Claw grabber..) Give yourself a budget, it’s like 50p to play air hockey and beat your OH, then you can be smug for the entire day too.
  8. Book a short break – You can book short breaks online with a deposit of like £20. OR if you go onto booking.com, on most of the hotels you don’t have to pay until you arrive. This means plenty of time to save.
  9. Board games – When was the last time you actually played a board game? Dust them off from the cupboard and give it ago. Again, if you win, you can be smug all day..
  10. Netflix and Chill – I love Netflix. Whoever invented the idea of Netflix is in my opinion, a god of their own. Put some PJ’s on, Face masks (Which your OH clearly does wanna do but just not when he’s being a “LAD”) and snuggle with a Netflix series. You’ll be surprised how much you get through.
  11. Go to a water park – Water world in stoke is huge. It’s around £10 each and you can be in there for hours!
  12. Play The SIMS – I recently downloaded this on my mac and have been playing it since. I keep building houses and being like “This is gonna be our house”. Sims is a guilty pleasure and Dan loves to pretend he doesn’t like it and then gets involved.

Don’t Mind Getting Wet..?

  1. Walk – Put your wellies on, act like a kid and go splash in puddles. Get your OH to take some photos so you have memories too! Anyone can get photos plus theres no one around if you feel awkward about posing. (I strongly recommend not doing this in jeans..wet jeans hurt.)

Failing all of this, just do the obvious…

IMG_7698

Happy Sunday!

Bees xo 

#TBT to when I argued with “style and curve” magazine about body positivity

So it’s Thursday, so lets do a throwback!

Around this time a year ago I had an argument with a ‘bigish’ magazine company called Style and curve magazine via social media.. below is a blog post from my other blog and heres the Instagram post that caused the drama!

IMG_5981

So, I’ve been ill the majority of the week, soo I have nothing fun or interesting to report or talk about either, other than what would happen if I ended up in law school, and my argument with an online magazine..

My life this week has literally consisted of hootsuite, Netflix & Suites. Maybe its a sign I should actually work in a law firm.. nah.

Can you imagine me as a lawyer? “This persons innocent cause she’s wearing a nice shade of Mac lipstick, so clearly she can’t possibly be a murderer…” I think i’ll stick to night clubs and stuff..

Anyway, yeah.. So this week I did have an argument with a magazine this called “Style and curve mag”.

They post loads of photos and quotes about not “body shaming”, in my eyes its 2016, if you’re still body shaming you really are a twat. So anyway, on Tuesday they added a photo on their Facebook and instagram page which had a photo of a curvy women with the quote

“No I don’t wear a size 0. But that’s only because I have the body of a Woman, not the body of a 12 year old.” – Unknown.

So my argument is, if that isn’t body shaming then what is? Why is it STILL totally acceptable for people to post stuff like this, but if anything is posted about larger people then they get so much grief and abuse for it? Why is it okay to call someone skinny and not call someone fat? To me this is a really sore subject.
So after reading the page myself, and looking at some of the comments there was ALOT of negativity on the post itself. After a few thousand of comments o the post, the page finally replied to people with..

“Style & Curve mag is sorry if this post made you angry. We want to state again that we support #BodyPositivity ONLY. The Reason why we shared the post was to get a reaction, which we can use in an article about this topic. We will write about body positivity from both sides the ones of bigger women and the thinner women. We are sort if you got angry about it, but now I got enough material to high light the problem of it and what still needs to be changed. This has nothing to do with us being hypocrites how one of you said. It basically has something to do with getting material to write for an article. We have no rights to take comments from other pages. And if we use your comments for an article (not to blame you) then also without your name. – kind regards, from style and curve.”

So basically.. you’re hypocritical idiots and you didn’t like the negative response you got on the post. So this is some type of apology, and this is you trying to justify and offensive post to start with. Why not just ask peoples opinions of the photo to start with, if that was the case…?

I messaged the page myself via inbox on facebook to actually attempt to talk to them..

Me : Hey, The fact you published an insulting post to get material for another article is disgusting. You should be ashamed, Not professional at all.

S&CM : Sarah, if you don’t like or disagree with our post then feel free to unlike out page, thnx

At this point I’m getting even more annoyed, I don’t like your stupid skinny hating page anyways, it was shared by my friend Em onto my facebook page.. but ok..

Me: I didn’t like your page in the first place, not really sure how you can say you don’t body shame. The post is offensive and should be just taken down. You’re making people feel shit about themselves.

S&CM: Whatever. Am not going to argue about this topic. We do have lots of supports and fans and year of course some don’t like our page, that’s life.

Me: I can’t believe how unprofessional you’re being. You’ve just insulted thousands of people for attention and material for an article basically?

S&CM: One more time, I’m not going to argue with you about our post, we do get plenty of messages every single day of women who feel glad and happy about our shared posts. We do not promote our pages at all. The reason why we do get so many likes is simple cause many people (and models) shares our pages/posts.

And then at this point I realised I was talking to an absolute hypocritical Idiot and made sure I blocked the page.

So basically, the moral of this story is, Style & curve mag are hypocritical, don’t care about their audience and are incapable of keeping their audience happy.. as long as they have material for their next article.. They don’t mind tricking their audience into leaving comments either. But I mean, its totally cool right? As long as you have your material, who cares who you insult anyway its only 2016 after all.. Go ahead and body shame slimmer people, who actually, like myself, find it really hard to gain weight.

This page can definitely stay blocked..

Time to go make a cup of tea and take my 12 year old body to bed I guess!

SO! I’ve had another look at their page this morning and looking now their a lot more positive and aren’t body shaming as much – I guess something positive DID come out of this after all! 

IMG_5980

It’s 2017, let’s stop body shaming guys! 

Bees
xo